You don’t know me

I’ve realized something interesting lately. You don’t know me. I know, I know. Brilliant, huh? But beyond the mere anonymity of this blog, it’s quite probable that you really don’t understand where I’m coming from.

Less than 0.05 percent of the World’s population is Mormon. If you aren’t Mormon, then you likely have no idea what it’s like to believe. All you can really say if I tell you I’ve learned Mormonism isn’t true is, “Well, duh.” And if you are Mormon, then you think I’m in grossest error by doubting. “Just believe,” you’ll say, or, “Why did you doubt? Didn’t you feel the Spirit?” or, perhaps more likely, “It’s obvious you’re in great sin and are no longer susceptible to the Spirit.” Only a very few people can understand what it’s like to have spent a lifetime believing and then to have come to a realization of the truth.

Only a very few people can understand the heartbreak and the anguish, the sense of betrayal and deception, the feelings of anger and helplessness, and then slowly, quietly, the gradual shift to acceptance, and then, finally, hope and optimism. It’s quite a journey, and I don’t pretend to have arrived. But I’m at a point where I’m looking forward to the journey.

And for those of you who want a better sense of what it’s like, I would like to recommend the excellent podcast Mormon Stories, which tells the stories from the perspective of Mormons. Some of the stories are from people like me, who discover the truth through study. Others are from people who still believe. Still others are from people who realized the truth only after extreme suffering because of their beliefs. Mormon Stories doesn’t try to convert you one way or another, but simply to tell you amazing stories that will fill you with compassion, no matter what you believe.

That’s my truth. What’s yours?